November 26, 2014

Best of Vague But True

It's True, I'm not Making That Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

PAID ADVERTISEMENT
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Vinyl Classics is thrilled to bring to America one of Germany's all time top artists Heino. Liebe Mutter (Dear Mother) is a 1971 release and after hearing it Vinyl Classics President Rick Rattler said "It's the funniest damn thing I have ever heard. Germans just shouldn't sing. Heino does this baritone thing with German folk songs and it's just fall down funny that he is popular over there. Get high, slap this record on the turntable and laugh your ass off. I swear to God Heino Parties could be the next big thing. Oh, by the way... Heino is a guy."
Geese Force Man To Move
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AURORA, Illinois- Local police were unable to help a man who called 911 complaining he couldn't sleep because of all the noise from upstairs. When police asked if he had talked to his neighbors the man said that the noisemakers were geese perched on the roof and honked right near a vent pipe so loudly that it echoed all the way down to his unit and kept him awake. Gary Dearborn is a truck driver who often works overnight and needs to sleep during the day but it's not possible with geese on the roof. "I had to move to a place that won't have roof geese or allows me to pick 'em off with a pellet gun. I gotta' get my sleep or I'll drive off the road."
The Smiling Goat
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CARMEL, California- "I simply don't know what to think," said Caroline Carr. "My goat seems so nice, he's always smiling at me. But things of mine go missing from my purse, even from the house and then I find a few of them in Bernie's (the goat) stall and I have to wonder what is this thing up to?"
Farmer Thinks Rooster Has It In For Him
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DYESS, Arkansas- People who grow up on farms tend to be comfortable around animals. That was certainly the case for Rick Reynolds who doesn't remember a time when he wasn't "tending to hogs and cows and horses and turkeys and all things not human." But one rooster named Cooper has Reynolds rethinking everything. "Cooper stalks me. Everywhere I go, I turn around around and he's just staring at me. If he don't stop he's gonna' end up in the roaster. I'd do it but he is such a good cock of the walk... the hens been laying eggs like I never seen. They love Cooper. But he is starting to freak me out."
They Never Thought They'd Have To But...
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LAKE TAHOE, California- They never thought they would have to point this out but the US Forest Service has put out an official statement telling park visitors that running up to bears and snapping selfies with them is a bad idea.
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