VINYL CLASSICS is proud to present the re-issue of Wasnatchl-Front To Back. Vinyl Classic President Rick Rettler said "To be honest this re-issue is kind of... well, this record is so bad it is good. This Wasnatchl claimed to be making, what he called, 'The sound of love.' His french horn would be both music and the sound of sex... it's awful. I can't stop laughing every time I hear it. You get this record and play it at a party, I swear people will be on the floor," said Rettler.
Run of the Weiners
CANTERBURY, Minnesota- If the horses can't run there's always the Dachshunds. Canterbury Downes race track could not let race horses out on the track because of water on the back stretch but fans got to place bets on a different species heading for the wire-14 Dachshunds. "I am sure the novelty had something to do with it but we made good money that day. People love to bet on which Weiner is best," said track spokesman Dale Petersen.
The Paul Pincus Classic MUSIC FOR HAPPY OCCASIONS has been re-released and re-packaged for today's world as MUSIC FOR CRAPPY OCCASIONS by Vinyl Classics. "Upbeat music for wonderful times" was how the Pincus Orchestra offering was first marketed. But Vinyl Classics decided today's tough times need a musical pick-me-up and re-packaged these perky melodies as MUSIC FOR CRAPPY OCCASIONS. Please visit vinylclassic.com today.
Cat Stands On Couch To Spy On Mailman
SECAUCUS, New Jersey- Ludicrus the cat either hates the mailman or is anxiously awaiting the delivery of a package because every day around mail-time Ludicrus jumps up on the couch and stands there until the mail is delivered. "I tried to stop her for awhile but she is determined to stand there until the mail gets here, so I just gave in. But I gotta' believe it hurts her back," said owner Sue Wadel.
Sharks Deny Man Life Giving Internet
MIAMI, Florida- Google is wrapping its fiber-optic cables in a Kevlar-like material, said Dan Belcher, product manager on the Google cloud team. Sharks have a "unique ability" to detect electromagnetic fields and believe that the cable is an animal," said George Burgess, director of the Florida Program for Shark Research. "No doubt the electromagnetic fields are highly attractive to these sharks," Burgess said. But others have other ideas. "Maybe this is all an excuse for lousy cable service," said Comcast internet customer Dirk Blachman.