February 06, 2012

Best of Vague But True

It's True, I'm not Making That Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

Coyote or Terminator?
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GRIMLY, Nevada- Coyotes are tough creatures but could one get hit by a Honda minivan at 75 mph, become embedded in the grill, ride for 600 miles and survive? The answer is a resounding, Yes! When Daniel and Tevyn East struck a coyote at 75mph they assumed, from the fatal sound of the impact, they had killed the animal and drove on. They didn't realize this was the toughest creature ever. Eight hours, two fuel stops, and 600 miles later, they found the wild animal embedded in their front fender and very much alive. No realizing the coyote was still amongst the living, Daniel tried to pry the fur out of the grill with a broom stick and got the shock of his life when the fur flinched. "I don't mind telling you the whole thing freaked us out. That coyote should not have survived that impact, let along come away without much more than a scratch."
700-pound Bear Terrorizes Nevada Town
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INCLINE VILLAGE. Nevada- Authorities and residents are on the lookout for a 700-pound bear that has been terrorizing the town all year. The bear has caused over $70,000 in damage breaking into 40 - 50 garages, freezers and homes, according to the Reno Gazette. "The deputies say he's the biggest bear they've ever seen," Carl Lackey, a biologist and bear expert for the Nevada Department of Wildlife, told the Gazette. Lackey has been chasing this bear for three years. "He'll walk right by a trap, but won't go in them. He's smart, seems to know what a trap looks like and knows what kind of houses have the good stuff in them, like smoked salmon and creme cheese. I wouldn't be surprised if he walked off with a plasma screen and an I-pod one day."
Pelican-1, Human-0
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LA MARQUE, Texas- A driver blamed a low flying pelican and a dropped cell phone for his veering his million-dollar sports car off a road and into a salt marsh near Galveston. The man said he was driving his luxury, French-built Bugatti Veyron when the bird distracted him, causing him to drop his cell phone, and when he reached to pick it up he veered off the road into the salt marsh. The car was half-submerged in the brine about 20 feet from the road when police arrived. An auto specialist on the scene said he doesn't know if the car was salvageable, but that, "Salt water isn't good for anything." Police report while the morose owner watched his car being pulled from the marsh a pelican perched nearby watching the proceedings. They are not sure if it was the same bird that started the chain of events.
Oklahoma, Where The Elephants Go Sweeping Down the Plains
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OKLAHOMA CITY, Oklahoma- It's not unusual to see a deer or a cow crossing Oklahoma's rural highways. But an elephant? A couple driving home from church nearly slammed into a giant pachyderm that had escaped from a nearby circus late Wednesday. "Didn't have time to hit the brakes," driver Bill Carpenter said Thursday. "All I had time to do was say, 'Elephant!'" Carpenter, 68, swerved his SUV at the last second and ended up sideswiping the 29-year-old female elephant. "Had I hit that elephant, it would have knocked it off its legs, and it would have landed right on top of us," he said. "We'd have been history. I know you can hit a deer or maybe a cow, but running into an elephant in Oklahoma just doesn't happen. The good Lord was with us," Carpenter said. The elephant's tusk punched through the side of the SUV, tearing up sheet metal. His wife, Deena, called the police but the dispatcher didn't believe her: "'You hit a what?'" he said. Local veterinarian Dr. Dwight Olson was called to the scene but said "The biggest thing I have ever treated was a bull mastiff. I did what I could but you make one mistake with a patient like this and your career could be over."
Coyotes Kill Teen Folk Singer
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NOVA SCOTIA, Canada- A teenage folk singer, Taylor Mitchell, 19, was attacked and killed by two coyotes in a national park in eastern Canada. "Coyotes are normally afraid of humans. This is a very irregular occurrence," said Bridgit Leger, a spokeswoman for the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. Biologists said attacks by coyotes are extremely rare because the animals are usually very wary of humans, but that may be changing. Suggestions by some in online national park website chat areas claim singing her folk songs may have been what provoked the coyotes to attack but park officials said the idea folk music is irritating to coyotes is offensive and that making any noise, including singing folk songs, to let animals know you are approaching, is a good idea.
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