November 23, 2014

Best of Vague But True

It's True, I'm not Making That Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

Climb For Cancer Cut Short by Gulls
MORRO BAY, California- Cam Kreiter has climbed the most challenging mountain faces in the world. To raise money for a friend facing surgery he told sponsors he would climb Morro Rock in record time. And he was on his way to doing just that until he was attacked by dozens of sea gulls. "They weren't protecting a nest. There was nothing there for them to get defensive about. They just didn't want me to make it to the top. I have been up here hundreds of times and this has never happened... until a friend's life was on the line."
Honeymoon Ruined By Baboons
CAPE TOWN, South Africa- Dave and Stacy LaJune had their honeymoon ruined by a baboon. Dozens of baboons, actually. "Dave said speed up and run'em down but I stopped and they were on us. They knew how to open the cargo carrier on the roof! They took my lingerie and put it on and started mocking sex acts. Some of my teddies we got back but I couldn't put them on after they had been worn by a dirty monkey," said the frustrated Stacy.
Dog Saves Human
SIOUX FALLS, South Dakota- The bond between a man and his dog knows no bounds. But, when Jeremy Kramer passed out after a drinking game with friends nobody expected his Puppy, Jaeger, to give him mouth to mouth resuscitation. "I guessed we should have stepped in and helped out ourselves but Jaeger kept huffing away till Jeremy came to," said his room mate Billy Jaye, "so I guess we weren't needed."
Woman Trampled By Herd Of Deer... On A Downtown Sidewalk
TARBORO, North Carolina- A business owner is recovering from injuries she suffered when she encountered a herd of deer on a downtown sidewalk. Michelle Brewer was opening her jewelry store when one deer passed by, then so many deer appeared that she couldn't move. The last thing Brewer remembers is being eye-level with nothing but deer before she hit the sidewalk. Others told her that one deer kicked her several feet in the air before the rest trampled her.
Pet Deer Tries To Drown Man
INDIAN MOUND, Tennessee- A man who was attacked by a pet deer said, "It was doing everything to kill me." It was a neighbor's pet deer that charged Timmy Keatts, as he was inspecting bales of hay on his in-laws’ farm. "I would rather have been in the ring with Ali," Keatts said. "He hit me pretty hard, then pushed me into the pond and tried to drown me. He was wallowing me in the bottom of the pond, and I was looking for anything I could get my hands on, and I came across some rocks which saved my life." Keatts said while he was bashing the deer with the rocks he was also having a heart attack. "They said what brought the heart attack on was the stress from fighting the deer,which is why I kept these rocks. They been very lucky for me."
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