January 31, 2015

Best of Vague But True

It's True, I'm not Making That Up

Best of Vague But True Vol 2

The Animal Conspiracy CD

World's Biggest Beaver Dam Visibile From Space
ALBERTA, Canada- Canadian beavers have built the world's longest dam-so big it can be seen from space. The incredible construction is a staggering half mile long and twice the size of Hoover dam. The furry critters used trees, mud and stone to make the giant moat to help protect themselves from predators. Sharon Brown, a biologist from Beavers United: an educational organization in North America, said several beaver families joined forces to create the massive dam, containing thousands of trees, and taking months to complete. When asked if the massive dam, visible from satellites, could be a signal to alien spacecraft, marking a remote landing spot, Brown said, "What? Are you serious? How did you get in here?"
"Once You Go Grizzly..."
ULUKHAKTOK, N.W.T.- Researchers in the Northwest Territories say they have found the first recorded case of a second-generation hybrid polar-grizzly bear in the wild. Officials said tests showed the bear was the offspring of a female hybrid polar-grizzly mix who had mated with a male grizzly. And this wasn't the result of a one-night stand. Female bears don't release their eggs until they are in the company of an approved male for at least two days. The female polar bears are actively choosing grizzly men. Some male grizzlies are even hunting seals on the sea ice, as polar bears do. "Perhaps the grizzly males are trying to impress the polar gals by doing things they like to do," said biologist Scott Ferrell. "It's like me going with my wife to look at antique furniture when I'd rather be watching a basketball game," added the scientist. Is this evidence of climate change? Ferrell believes it is. "If it was all snow and ice the grizzles would not even be that far north for this hooking up."
Ants Point Way To Food
QUAIL RUN, Arizona- Denise Baumgartner wondered how squirrels kept finding the food in her rusty and partially porous RV. She wrapped bread in plastic bags then put it in plastic snap lid containers but the squirrels kept finding it and chewing through while she was out hiking. But now she thinks she knows. "Ants are always in here and they see me putting food away for safe keeping. And for days now a bunch of them have been forming an arrow pointing right at my stash spots," claims Baumgartner, who spots the pointing ants through the window once she has left.
Flipper Fatally Flips Friends
PROVINCETOWN, Massachusetts- A canoeist died after he and a friend were tossed into the water by marine animals near Long Point Lighthouse in Provincetown. The survivor told the Coast Guard that he and the victim had been in calm water when their canoe was suddenly upturned by dolphins.
Fawn Defends Fish
SNAKE VALLEY, Montana- Jack Jena is probably the only fisherman who can honestly claim he didn't catch anything because a fawn snapped at his crotch, forcing him to leave his favorite stream. "Never seen nuthin' like it. For a fawn to approach is one thing. But to charge at me every time a trout got near and get snippy at my manhood is weird. Next time I am going to bring a pool cue or broom or a net or something," said the angry angler.
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