January 21, 2018
Bird eat dog economy
Did you hear that story about the couple who drove all the way from Georgia to Valdez, Alaska, and while gassing up their Winnebago an eagle swooped down and made off with their chihuahua? True story.

Unbeknownst to this couple, an eagle lived in a roost high above the gas station where they stopped. The eagle saw the wife walking her chihuahua and thought "Oh Boy. Mexican food!" Actually, that part wasn't in the newspaper. I added that. The eagle probably just responded to the chihuahua as a food source, not as an ethnic food different from say... a French poodle or German shorthair. Although wouldn't it be wild if we found out that eagles who fed, primarily on poodles had higher cholesterol than those that ate schnauzers or springer spaniels?

Anyway, the poor woman sees this eagle take off with her beloved "Schnookie" or "Schnookums" or "Bob" or whatever she called it and she knew her chihuahua wasn't just going for a ride. This eagle had just beaten her chihuahua in the survival of the fittest game. And realizing that, she understandably collapsed in tears, nearly falling into the bucket where they keep the windshield washer thing. I added that.

Her husband, dutifully consoled his wife and then compassionately helped her into the Winnebago. But witnesses said once he was out of his wife's sight behind the Winnebago the husband started jumping up and down and pumping his fist in the air, thrilled his most fervent prayer- somehow that lousy dog would leave this Earth- had finally been answered.

And basically that is how I see our economy. Sometimes it seems like America is cruising down the highway, on vacation, singing happy songs and nothing can stop us. Other times it seems like Alan Greenspan is going to swoop down and steal our pet.

It's such a volatile, eagle eat dog world. Who knows what to do? You buy low and sell high but did you sell at the right high and why didn't you buy and hold and whatever you do you always end up thinking the eagles made off with your chihuahua. And that's not a good feeling... unless you bet on the eagle and are jumping up and down behind your Winnebago.