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What I have to say about Pirates of Silicon Valley is... I'd rather have watched the Brian Wilson Biography on A. and E. which I flipped over to during commercials. Did you know Brian Wilson lived in a sandbox for 22 years? I didn't see the whole Brian Wilson thing because I was supposed to be watching the Pirate movie but I think they said he lived in a sand box he put in his living room. It must be nice to be rich.
Anyway the Pirate Movie basically jumped back and forth between Bill Gates and Steve Jobs taking turns stealing ideas from Xerox whose executives didn't think the personal computer had a future, and thus were idiots. When Gates and Jobs weren't stealing from Xerox or each other they were treating their friends and employees badly or kind of badly. And oh yes, IBM was stupid like Xerox but not as stupid. That was the basic story.
It's been awhile since I was in college but I do remember in film class they said a good story needs a good guy and a bad guy or a struggle between good and evil. I can't tell who the people making Pirates of Silicon Valley thought was the good guy in their story. Although they had Noah Wylie from E.R. play Jobs and Anthony Michael Hall play Gates. Wylie is one of the hottest stars in television and Hall is... not. He's only making bad made-for-T.V.-movies about computer geeks so maybe they think Jobs was their hero but not by much.
There was one scene that did have the ring of truth- Steve Jobs accused Bill Gates of stealing his software and said "The Mac is still better than Windows." And Gates, because he had better distribution said, "It doesn't matter." I think they got that part right.
So, Xerox and IBM were stupid and made multi-billionaires out of Jobs and Gates and the rest of the Beach Boys were idiots because they wanted to keep making "Little Deuce Coupe" and "Barbara Ann" while Brian wanted to make one of the most influential albums in rock history, "Pet Sounds." In short, Pirates of Silicon Valley was no "Pet Sounds."
And by the way, so I wouldn't be unduly influenced, I wrote this review on a yellow legal pad with an analog pen.
Is it ever morally acceptable to steal cable? Certainly, it is in college. Because, in college you should be studying, not spending money on television. And besides, stealing cable is the kind of llegal hijinx that's part of a well-rounded college experience. Once, my room-mates and I tried to sell the college library. We relocated "for sale" signs from the houses realtors were trying to sell and put them all around our university library. We had a few walk-throughs but couldn't move the property.
Anyway, I was discussing cable theft with friends because one of them is currently pirating basic as well as the premium channels. A few people in the group thought it was always immoral. A few others thought anytime you can get money back from a big corporation you should. One couple, who believes in open marriage, thought T.V. itself was immoral and nobody should own one.
But the question was - if for seven years, the cable absconder in question paid for basic cable and CBS never came in clearly did they have the right to get some of their money back by stealing cable for awhile? The immoral group said, "If you are unhappy with the quality of a product don't buy it." The pro-cable thieves group countered by saying "T.V. is life itself. The cable barons were sucking the air out of your lungs. Now you're just evening the score." Everybody, including the open marriage couple, had a good point... about stealing cable.
Personally, I think historically the cable industry has behaved like a big, nasty old dog that bites children and needs to be put to sleep. But this I am sure of - now that I have a daughter and I'm supposed to be setting a good moral example, I think every merger that creates competition for the cable industry is good because competition means it's less likely Letterman will come in fuzzy. And every merger that makes for a monopoly in a T.V. delivery system is bad. Because that's why CBS came in fuzzy in the first place. As for open marriage, I think a half way open marriage that allowed for the inclusion of another woman..., well, you can see the hitch in that plan.
And for you college kids, I am not saying cable theft is moral or good. I'm just saying at your 20 year class reunion you don't spend much time talking about calculus or how often you currently use those required geography credits. It's the social stuff you reminisce about. Like the time we staggered into the police station and confessed to the Lindbergh baby kidnapping. Not immoral or illegal and in only slightly bad taste. A perfect college activity.
I was reading an article on professional wrestling the other day and I was shocked to find out... it's fixed!!! Can you believe it?
Actually, I was shocked to find out professional wrestling is such a huge business. The World Wrestling Federation, has taken in over 230 million dollars already this year.
Why do people pay money to see a contest they know the outcome of, in advance? Probably, for the same reason they go see the Spice Girls. They don't care about integrity or content, they just want a big, flashy, fun show you can sing or scream along with.
Anyway, this article said the secret of the success of professional wrestling is the primal appeal of the struggle between Good and Evil. And sex-- the other primal thing mankind has loved throughout the ages. And that's why the W.W.F. T.V. show has a lot of skin and sexual innuendo along with the between good guys and bad guys.
But still... it's fixed. Where is the drama? Why do they bother? Why does Pat Buchanan run for President? Maybe people watch professional wrestling and the primaries for a good scare and to be reassured that, in the end, Good does triumph over Evil
There was a quote in the article that perhaps summed up the appeal of professional wrestling. A young man said "I know it's fixed but at least it's a sport that still has super-heroes."
My fear, though, is if we as a nation don't see the difference between Michael Jordan and the phony heroics of professional wrestling then we are telling industry, as consumers, we don't care about quality. Maybe I'm overreacting but do you remember the cars America made in the 70's? Remember disco and bell-bottoms? Well, two of those three mistake are back.
I hope I'm wrong and the popularity of professional wrestling is not a sign our culture is headed to hell in a speed of light hand basket... Maybe some people just like the certainty of rooting for a winner who always wins and will spend money to see that certainty re-enacted. Other people invest in the stock market. Now that the WWF has gone public some people will be betting on the stock of a sport that's fixed. But if lots of Americans start betting on the outcome of professional wrestling matches, put all your savings in gold bricks and buy a Japanese car because things could get really weird.
Some people are saying last year was the greatest season baseball ever had because the glory and the splendor and the timelessness of the game was back. And this year the team owners want to capitalize on that momentum and re-connection with the history of the game by putting advertising on the player's uniforms.
Which is understandable because the Los Angeles Dodgers are paying one guy 11 million dollars a year. So, of course to offset that salary the owners are looking for new revenue sources. But how much could they charge for a little golden arches logo on the sleeve of a big league player. I say go all the way and make the team the Los Angeles Quarter Pounders with Cheese. How much money do they make off the name Dodgers? A big fat nothing. There is no licensing fee paid by Dodger Inc. for having that big Dodgers name across the front of that uniform.
On the other hand, if the Giants became known as the San Francisco Treats, Rice-a-Roni might pay a lot of money for that prime spot on a players chest.
Who wouldn't want to go see the Detroit Chrysler-Daimler Le Barons play the Old Milwaukee Malt Liqours.
Furthermore, I think when a Milwaukee player is not hitting well or has made a few errors in the field he should have to wear a giant beer can between innings. And guess what, you'd see a little more focus out of that player the next time he's up at the plate.
There are those who are critical of the owners for having gotten themselves into a situation where they're paying players 11 million dollars a year and then have to put advertising logos on their jerseys to make up for pay for it but I say if you're in business to make money make the whole uniform look like a big bag of french fries.
And if the owners go went through with this uniform as advertising strategy and presented a player making 11 million dollars a year with a uniform that looked like a six foot Burrito Supreme, I'll bet that player would say "If I play for six million a year can I just wear white?"
What's my point? I'm not sure. But I know this. Baseball for me was one of the last great pure things in American life. You goofball owners need to straighten your act out because if you can't revenue share and control salaries and need to put logos on the uniforms... you've messed up big time. And if you're only in it for the money then please go all the way. Sell the whole uniform to Bill Gates and be the Seattle Tech nerds, NT 98, illegal operation shut down whatevers.
Minus the return of El Nino' or La Nina' or some other strange Latino weather phenomenon, summer is on the way. For many Americans summer means baseball and picnics and barbecues but for all Americans summer means higher gas prices..
And especially for the people of San Francisco because I just read in the paper that San Francisco has replaced Honolulu as the town with the highest gas prices in America. Which is surprising because much of the gas bought across the Western U.S. is refined in the Bay area. And yet, somehow gas is cheaper in Honolulu than it is right in San Francisco. .
Now, I know the Bay Bridge can get crowded at times and bridge tolls have gone up and parking in San Francisco can be a nightmare... but those added expenses can't make up for the fact the oil companies didn't have to put their gas on a boat and float it over to Hawaii. .
Gas is more expensive in San Francisco because oil companies know San Franciscans have more disposable income to spend on it than Bakersfield-ians or Fresno-sians or Lompoc-ians, otherwise known as the folk of Lompoc..
And the oil companies can get away with it because what are San Franciscans gonna do about higher prices, anyway? You can't order gas over the Internet. I shouldn't say that... maybe you can get gas over the Internet but who has that kind of closet space?.
What the oil companies say about all this is, and I am ROUGHLY quoting one of the slippery rascals - THAT'S NOT A QUOTE - from the newspaper article, "We don't arbitrarily raise prices in the summer. It's supply and demand. The marketplace tells us what to do." Really? Well, on behalf of the consumers who make up the marketplace let me suggest you give us gas for free. In fact, check the oil and clean the windshield Sparky. Let's see how you respond to the marketplace on that..
The oily guy in this article said the reason they have to raise gas prices in summer because the demand is greater. You oil companies might try doing what 7/11's and supermarkets do with beer and soda before summer stock up. Those companies seem to remember people drink more beer and soda in the summer and want to have lots on hand at low, low prices..
In fact, I am going to help you greasy devils out. Next March I am going
to call up all YOU oil companies and remind you summer is coming, people
drive more... get more oil in the literal and proverbial pipeline. And
if you lower your price to 19 cents a gallon and give everyone a free pie
plate or coffee mug with every fill up, I'll know you truly are responding
to the marketplace. And if you don't I might just buy your stock because
that's a pretty neat little racket you have going there. In Los Angeles,
I'm Tim Bedore for Markeplace.
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